Beers, Booty-Shaking, and Jesus?
This is a guest post by Nicole Unice.
I have a confession to make. I like pop music.
And not just the Miley Cyrus, High School Musical flavor. I like the beat thumping, chorus humming, andâ€â€dare I say itâ€â€booty-shaking kind. There it is. I am a woman in my early 30s, with three children and a minivan. I run a Christian counseling practice and a women’s ministry. People look to me for soul direction and depth, and in my spare time, I like to dance around and get low, low, low.
The best part? I think that’s OK with Jesus.
My senior pastor plays tennis on a team with my husband’s co-worker. Last week, the team finished a game and had some beers in a cooler. One of them offered my pastor a beer and (gasp!) he took it. Later, the co-worker told my husband that he cringed because his teammate must not have known he was offering a beer to a pastor. The co-worker reported. “Wow, I was surprised he had a beer with us. That’s cool.â€ÂDisarming the Religion Bomb
The door is open for my husband to invite his co-worker to our church, because he is disarmedâ€â€experiencing something that goes against his preconceived notions of Christianity. I think that’s OK with Jesus too.
The dictionary tells me that to “disarm†is to deprive of a weapon or remove the fuse. The word also means to relieve suspicion or win affection. I wonder about the suspicions people have toward Christians, and therefore Christianity: They judge me. They are better than I am. They won’t approve of me. I won’t fit in with their religion. They are all serious and no fun.
When I read the gospels, I think Jesus used this method. We know he hung around enough parties for the Pharisees to accuse him of being a drunkard. We know he befriended and taught forbidden women, despised men and pesky children.
I think the Jesus way was to disarm those around him while still being true to his mission. He interacted with culture and people so he could introduce them to his Father. He lived his life in a way that broke through stereotypes and communicated God, as he is approachable, merciful and graceful. The people who were most upset by Jesus were the ones who preferred the status quoâ€â€the rules of the religion.
Good Enough?
The women I talk with often tell me they will find a church “when they are good.†I usually laugh and tell them I’m still waiting to be good enough for church, but thankfully, that’s not what all churches are about. Sometimes an entire conversation with a teenager will be devoted to the current fashion and drama of the weekâ€â€and then we talk about God. Disarming, isn’t it? The concept of living a free and joyful life with Jesus may seem like a basic concept for you. But is that what your neighbors think, the ones who haven’t been in church since their feet could hit the floor from the pew?
When we live our lives authentically, joyfully, and in a real-people kind of way, those around us are disarmed. They are surprised. They encounter a kind of “religion†that doesn’t fit their status quo.
It is tempting to become more invested at church and less interested in the secular world around us. It feels as comfortable as sweatpants to hang out with people who believe and feel as we do. Fellowship among believers is a wonderful gift and necessary component of our faith. But if we are truly to follow Jesus’ example, we need to look for opportunities to engage and disarm those around us. We must seek the balance in our life for the dual imperatives of holiness and relevance. When we live our lives to the full, in joy and freedom, we are disarming. We are real. And we win affection for Christ.
Question: Have you experienced disarming someone for Christ? How do you engage in your culture without diluting Christ’s message or falling into your own sinful patterns?
Nicole, wonderful post.Awesome that you have a pastor that is able and willing to just be a person.
Justin, you might want to consider adding a message at the beginning signifying its a guest post. I thought you became a 30 year old woman for a second.
I think all Christians can be “disarming” and “relevant to culture” without compromising. Just because your pastor accepted a beer does not make him cool or relevant. A life of holiness is one that should stand out from the rest of culture – not fit in. Jesus was perfect – he hung out with sinners but did not partake in their sinfulness. I do my best to do the same.
Thanks for your thoughts. I do agree that trying to be “cool” and doing things that go against your understanding of morality are not what Jesus would do. However, if my pastor drinks an occasional beer, wouldn't it be hypocritical to not accept one because of his “pastor” image? I do think that each has to walk the line–to respect and honor the weakest brother while still walking free through our lives as Christians.
Justin, if I'm gonna keep posting over here you are seriously going to need to move my picture to the top of the post. People are starting to wonder about you….
Crap. Don't know how I missed that! Changing now . . . . .
Sorry Buddy …. Got to jump in here.
It seems as though you're suggesting that drinking a beer is compromising in some way. Is this correct? If so, what would this pastor be compromising? What changes if he drinks a beer?
Let me know.
I would agree with you that we are to be in the world. But, we are not of the world.. Using your example the pastor could have excused himself from taking the beer and still remained relevent to the group of guys. If your husbands co-worker did not know he was a pastor, after several matches, shame on the pastor. He should have taken the oportunity to share Jesus with the team. Remember Jesus was ACCUSED by the religious establisment Scripture never says he was a drunkard at any time.
I think the perception of alcohol is different in a small town versus the city. In the city, people go to the bar sometimes for reasons other than getting rip roaring drunk. In a small town, it's a lot more about getting drunk. My husband and I are pastors in a small town. I feel uncomfortable drinking around congregation members, though I have gone on record publicly in saying that there is nothing wrong with drinking (as long as it is not a stumbling block to you personally) and I don't make it a secret that I enjoy a glass of wine here or there.
One of the big problems around here though is alcoholism. I know there is alcoholism in cities too but in a small town, it's a REALLY big problem…As in, there is not much to do socially around here except go to casinos and go to the bar. Teens drink a lot too. So, I am torn. I think Jesus would be in the bar, probably….but I also don't want to cause a weaker brother or sister to stumble.
Nicole,
Honestly, I don't know your pastor so it's hard for me to determine what would and would not be hypocritical for him. There's probably a thousand scenarios we could debate on what is hypocritical and what is not, all I'm saying is that he doesn't have to drink a beer with his tennis team to “be disarmed.” The door is ALWAYS open to invite someone to church or share the gospel with them.
Justin,
Drinking a beer is definitely compromising for me. However, I understand Scripture is not entirely clear on the morality of drinking a beer or shaking your booty. The pastor is free to do what he wants, but I would caution that Scripture does call pastors specifically to be above reproach (or blameless, depending on the translation, read I Tim 3:2).
I would question his motive, but I have no idea what his motive was. I do know Jesus hung out with “publicans and sinners”, even prostitutes, but he never partook in the sin. This is significant. We as Christians are called to be in the world, but not of the world (I know that is a cliche verse for this discussion, but I couldn't resist).
If an unsaved person sees a pastor drinking a beer, or participating in any other questionable behavior, don't you think that person could say, “hey that pastor is just like me, so why should I change any of my behaviors to have a good relationship with God like he does.” I realize there are thousands of “questionable behaviors” that could fall into this category, hundreds I'm sure that I partake in that I have no problem with that another Christian would have a problem with, but for some reason, the whole drinking beer thing is especially personal to me. I just don't see the point of it.
I guess the big difference here is what you said “pastor drinking a beer, or participating in any other questionable behavior.” Truly Christians differ on whether one beer with friends is actually “questionable behavior.” I appreciate the other comments about examining your context. It's said that C.S. Lewis got together with his buds at the pub to talk theology…
And btw, I saw that tennis player at church yesterday.
Sorry Buddy …. Got to jump in here.
It seems as though you're suggesting that drinking a beer is compromising in some way. Is this correct? If so, what would this pastor be compromising? What changes if he drinks a beer?
Let me know.
I would agree with you that we are to be in the world. But, we are not of the world.. Using your example the pastor could have excused himself from taking the beer and still remained relevent to the group of guys. If your husbands co-worker did not know he was a pastor, after several matches, shame on the pastor. He should have taken the oportunity to share Jesus with the team. Remember Jesus was ACCUSED by the religious establisment Scripture never says he was a drunkard at any time.
I think the perception of alcohol is different in a small town versus the city. In the city, people go to the bar sometimes for reasons other than getting rip roaring drunk. In a small town, it's a lot more about getting drunk. My husband and I are pastors in a small town. I feel uncomfortable drinking around congregation members, though I have gone on record publicly in saying that there is nothing wrong with drinking (as long as it is not a stumbling block to you personally) and I don't make it a secret that I enjoy a glass of wine here or there.
One of the big problems around here though is alcoholism. I know there is alcoholism in cities too but in a small town, it's a REALLY big problem…As in, there is not much to do socially around here except go to casinos and go to the bar. Teens drink a lot too. So, I am torn. I think Jesus would be in the bar, probably….but I also don't want to cause a weaker brother or sister to stumble.
Nicole,
Honestly, I don't know your pastor so it's hard for me to determine what would and would not be hypocritical for him. There's probably a thousand scenarios we could debate on what is hypocritical and what is not, all I'm saying is that he doesn't have to drink a beer with his tennis team to “be disarmed.” The door is ALWAYS open to invite someone to church or share the gospel with them.
Justin,
Drinking a beer is definitely compromising for me. However, I understand Scripture is not entirely clear on the morality of drinking a beer or shaking your booty. The pastor is free to do what he wants, but I would caution that Scripture does call pastors specifically to be above reproach (or blameless, depending on the translation, read I Tim 3:2).
I would question his motive, but I have no idea what his motive was. I do know Jesus hung out with “publicans and sinners”, even prostitutes, but he never partook in the sin. This is significant. We as Christians are called to be in the world, but not of the world (I know that is a cliche verse for this discussion, but I couldn't resist).
If an unsaved person sees a pastor drinking a beer, or participating in any other questionable behavior, don't you think that person could say, “hey that pastor is just like me, so why should I change any of my behaviors to have a good relationship with God like he does.” I realize there are thousands of “questionable behaviors” that could fall into this category, hundreds I'm sure that I partake in that I have no problem with that another Christian would have a problem with, but for some reason, the whole drinking beer thing is especially personal to me. I just don't see the point of it.
I guess the big difference here is what you said “pastor drinking a beer, or participating in any other questionable behavior.” Truly Christians differ on whether one beer with friends is actually “questionable behavior.” I appreciate the other comments about examining your context. It's said that C.S. Lewis got together with his buds at the pub to talk theology…
And btw, I saw that tennis player at church yesterday.
It seems my comments are always coming two weeks later, but with that said, I applaud Nicole for putting her un-self-righteous booty out there. I envy those in Christianity who live in this messy world of humanity and are able to view it with such stark black and white lenses. The spiritual walk just seems a little less bumpy with nothing to write home about. However, I admire those who don't fear the gray, the mess, and humanity while managing to stay in love with Jesus.
It seems my comments are always coming two weeks later, but with that said, I applaud Nicole for putting her un-self-righteous booty out there. I envy those in Christianity who live in this messy world of humanity and are able to view it with such stark black and white lenses. The spiritual walk just seems a little less bumpy with nothing to write home about. However, I admire those who don't fear the gray, the mess, and humanity while managing to stay in love with Jesus.