I‘ve never been to New York City.
The farthest east I’ve been is Weirton, West Virginia, where they brew and bottle their own beer and make steel like it’s their job. Because it is.
I’m going to New York City this week with my wife and my family-in-law (mother-, father- and brother- to be exact.) I’m really curious to see if all the stereotypes of New Yorkers are true:
“They’re all rude.”
“You’ll get mugged. Wear a fanny pack.”
“All the cabbies smell.”
“They’ll stab you if you go into the Park after dark.”
“All they eat is pizza.”
“Bums urinate on the subway.”
“The city never sleeps. Wait, that’s Las Vegas. Isn’t it? Shoot. I’ll just have a bagel with lox and call it a day.”
You get the idea.
Have you ever been to New York City? What should we see? What should we avoid? Where’s the best place to get pizza? Best place to get coffee (if you say “Central Perk” I will kindly respond by saying, “it’s not a real place. Trust me, I’ve already looked into it.”)?
My father-in-law is from this area. He even played college football for the Syracuse Orangemen. I must say, I’m glad he’ll be with us, leading us on our maiden voyage to what could be a “strange land” for this Midwestern guy. I’m glad he’ll be there, a.) because it will be fun to get to know him and my mother-in-law better and, b.) he will serve as our interpreter/guide/overall thug in case any New Yorkers give us guff. (After I asked for his blessing to marry Kerry – my now-wife, his daughter – he gave me a hug and slapped my back so hard I thought a vertebrae had dislodged and fallen out the bottom of my shoe.) Skadoosh suckas!